Frankly

I want to be the type of person who doesn't badmouth someone to make myself feel better.

I want to be the type of person who really, truly accepts people for who there are, where they are.

I want to be the type of person who doesn't need to understand why someone does something, just that they have the right to do it.*


Earlier I texted a friend something mean about another person. I felt absolved because I announced the meanness before I proceeded. It's like apologizing before you punch someone in the face. Punching someone in the face is still a shitty thing to do.

An hour later I sat in moral outrage as a group of people started a mean-spirited conversation online about a person who isn't a member of the group. I wanted to post:

What is wrong with you? 

Don't you have better things to do? 

Grow up!

What makes you think this is okay? 

How would YOU feel? 

And then I would storm off (internetly) riding my high horse, Frank, into the sunset.

Luckily (or whatever), Frank and I have been together a long time and he's learned to kick me off if I give him enough time to stop eating carrots.

Today I vowed to be better than that. To not gossip for gossip's sake. To not build up by tearing down.

I want to be the type of person who doesn't have to make vows to be kinder because the habit of judgement has become more pervasive than the habit of acceptance.  When did that happen?

I want to be better than a person who names her high horse.

I will try again tomorrow.
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*So long as they actually DO have the right to. All things illegal or inhumane being exempt from this thought process.